I recently found out that I am three months pregnant. The problem is that my boyfriend and I have only been dating for two months. I wish this all wasn't happening because we really do love each other and I don't know what to do. I don't want to lose him, so is there a way I can make him think the baby is his? I know he will be the best father for the child. Do you think this will work?
Yeah, that should work flawlessly, I’m sure, because there is nothing men like to hear more after a two month courtship than “Honey, I’m pregnant with your child.” Yes, that was all sarcasm but I’m asking you, to take a step back and observe the delusion that you have created. This may be a reasonable solution in what ever trailer-park you are writing from but let me say this as clearly as possible, “no you can’t choose yo baby daddy.” Rather you can, you just have to do it before conception. Just because you’re in a good place right now with this new guy doesn’t mean that the baby bomb is going to make things easier. It’s actually more likely to cause a great deal of change in your relationship. This will happen regardless if it’s his child or not. Once you can objectively look at this situation I think you will start to understand what you must do.
First off I assume this idea of motherhood is a new concept for you. You’re probably confused and undoubtedly scared. It should start sinking in that you are growing a new life inside of you and that this little one is your responsibility (along with the genetic father). Try seeing this whole “daddy swap” idea through the baby’s eyes. No child wants to be born into a deceptive mess like you are talking about creating. So this should be your first red light.
Just because you think you have the power to rewind the tape and change who fathered your child doesn’t make it the right thing to do. Most of all, the delusion that this will make your life easier is both selfish and incorrect. If you follow through on this it will backfire on you and will only serve to alienate both the genetic father, the make-believe father, and the child, leaving you all alone. Is this really what you want to happen? Do you really want your life to turn into an episode on the Tyra Banks show?
It should become clear to you now that telling your former lover about his baby and breaking the news to your now boyfriend is the easiest way to go. It will be hard in the beginning, but things will get easier with time and the trust you build with both men will be your reward. Evolution of the modern family is growing without boundaries. Don’t sell yourself short by doing what is easier now and worrying about it for the rest of your life. You will soon be busy with raising your child and these difficulties will seem small in comparison.